Reluctant public disclosure: I'm applying to graduate school.
The process is murky. I find it hard to write a personal statement or statement of academic purpose.
Perhaps my problem is that word: purpose.
Fortunately, I've enlisted the services of a willing critic-whom has provided an absurd level of patience with my crappy first drafts.
The response to my first draft:
"This meanders and ambles too much. Remove the affective and chatty sentences. Send me the next draft."
The response to my second draft:
"It is painful to read this sort of jargon and corporate speak from a person with your background. Try again."
Next draft response:
"The voice is the voice of the village. Use it."
And,
"I notice that you use plain, simple language, short words and brief sentences. That is the way to write English-it is the modern way and the best way. Stick to it; don't let fluff and flowers and verbosity creep in. When you catch an adjective, kill it. No, I don't mean utterly, but kill most of them-then the rest will be valuable. They weaken when they are close together. They give strength when they are wide apart. An adjective habit, or a wordy, diffuse, flowery habit, once fastened upon a person, is as hard to get rid of as any other vice." -Mark Twain Letter to D.W. Bowser, 3/20/1880
The process is murky. I find it hard to write a personal statement or statement of academic purpose.
Perhaps my problem is that word: purpose.
Fortunately, I've enlisted the services of a willing critic-whom has provided an absurd level of patience with my crappy first drafts.
The response to my first draft:
"This meanders and ambles too much. Remove the affective and chatty sentences. Send me the next draft."
The response to my second draft:
"It is painful to read this sort of jargon and corporate speak from a person with your background. Try again."
Next draft response:
"The voice is the voice of the village. Use it."
And,
"I notice that you use plain, simple language, short words and brief sentences. That is the way to write English-it is the modern way and the best way. Stick to it; don't let fluff and flowers and verbosity creep in. When you catch an adjective, kill it. No, I don't mean utterly, but kill most of them-then the rest will be valuable. They weaken when they are close together. They give strength when they are wide apart. An adjective habit, or a wordy, diffuse, flowery habit, once fastened upon a person, is as hard to get rid of as any other vice." -Mark Twain Letter to D.W. Bowser, 3/20/1880
"Style is not-can never be-extraneous Ornament. Whenever you feel an impulse to perpetrate a piece of exceptionally fine writing, obey it-whole-heartedly-and delete it before sending your manuscript to press. Murder your darlings."
-Sir Arthur Quiller-Couch (1863-1944). On the Art of Writing. 1916.
Last draft-finally nailed it, at least for this critic.
Next task=write an Academic Statement of Purpose.
I am walking in a fog of mental murkiness with a machete. And I need to murder my darlings.
Good luck, Kit! You are brilliant and articulate and I trust that you will find the right path to continue your journey =)
ReplyDeleteThank you, friend;)))
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